Why are traumas necessary?


Hey! Long time no see… I apologize beforehand because this blog might trigger your anger towards a certain person or a situation and also because for your benefit anyhow, I will be indirectly and directly touching your unhealed scars. But why will I? I will do so to make you understand the importance of that trauma. The same traumatic experience which doesn’t let you sleep, makes you anxious and had changed you. Changed you for the better, did it? Ask your psyche, it will say a big fat yes! 

Recall the time when you were absolutely free from the thoughts of being in a trauma. You didn’t know how it was to feel that pain and also you didn’t know how to glow and grow after having survived that pain. But guess what? You survived as much as you suffered. Obviously, our generation has made a whole lot of shit normal and that is toxic but don’t you dare belittle the time when you felt and were certainly drowning. Many of us, after overcoming a trauma either make a huge fuss about it or degrade it and avoid talking about it like a kid ignores the green vegetables. Here, I want you to value my attempt of helping you understand the importance of the trauma you have been trying to overcome but are terribly losing because eventually, you are diving deeper (maybe not intentionally). 

If I ask you to mention something you never want or had wanted to occur, what would it be? (awkwardness/clumsiness in front of crush is not to be mentioned in this case) What is the reason behind you not wanting it to happen? Now that it had happened, what is that one thing you acquired and grasped through that situation that had added value to your life? Is that trait considered as per you essential? Is that wisdom according to you something that brought to closer to your thoughts? Honestly, I can already hear your positive feedback with a bit of an upset face. Well, you are upset from your past and your emotions are reflected onto the present which holds the power of what might happen in the future. (Kabhi kabhi kitna mast bol deti hun na mai?!) (okay accepted, zyadatar!)

Now, analyse. Wisdom is just trauma you overcame. Had that situation not occurred, you would have not understood an emotion that you hold now and also you wouldn’t have understood the power your mind has of being able to cope with that feeling. 

What is the ultimate purpose of life or anybody’s living? Growth. Consider a plant, animal, insect or human. You can also consider a living being who is dependent on any other living being for its survival. Ultimate purpose? Growth. 

Be your desires be kiddish or sensible, somehow everything we want or need is relatable with growth. And growth has a very dear friend. A friend he never leaves but a friend that can leave growth. How and when? That friend, ‘pain’ can leave growth if the perspective of the living being towards growth is ‘learning’, ‘living in the moment’ and ‘non-attachment.’ Moreover, growth has a best friend named, ‘perception’, and hence it all depends on the sight of the living being.

Coming back to square one and talking about the trauma you faced or had to, most of us are either happy with where we are heading and content with what we are striving for. Yes, it’s perfectly alright to feel down and bored at times with the hustle and its perfectly okay too to be perplexed and overwhelmed. But what is crucial is being not fully sloppy and slackening towards our ambitions. 

Traumas are necessary. Life cannot always give you happiness but it always gives you the power and authority to create it anytime and anywhere. Had that thing not occurred, you would have never known rather discovered your limit of being limitless. Had it not happened, you wouldn’t have known that you can deal with anything like that and still be bouncing harder and higher. 

There are situations which we think shouldn’t have had happened and they just frustrate us, even more, when we are unable to think of any fruitful upshot. Somebody’s accident, death or maybe a break-up. Situations and heartfelt pain from these hurt us and it is NORMAL. It is humane. But what is more humane is rising from that dust and not letting it burn you. And something that is most humane is not behaving like a standstill. 

Sooner or later, your conscience will help you connect the dots. You will understand the reason behind everything that happened and you will be grateful for it. Always remember that you are heading towards a better future or are living a better present only if you are able to bring out the best from the past occurrences. And so, instead of or perhaps simultaneously look at the brighter side. The grass is greener where you water it. I hope you know the scarcity of drinkable water earth will be facing anytime soon?! Therefore, use it wisely! Sprinkle where you know a flower can bloom and fruit can be ready for being eaten.

Lastly, be proud of yourself. Something that didn’t kill you made you stronger. Be proud of yourself and pat on your back for being able to survive through a situation you never knew you held the power of dealing with. Be proud, content and blissful! 

Whatever happened, happened. Whatever happens, happens.

Traumas are necessary because:

  1. You learn the importance of the good times.
  2. You understand that happiness is to be created.
  3. You understand your power.
  4. You understand the importance of having an even more enhanced outlook.
  5. You understand that there will be good times and bad too but their duration is decided by how you react to them.

Hasta La Vista. 


5 thoughts on “Why are traumas necessary?

  1. Woah 🙂
    What a beautiful piece of hope. As Andy Dufresne says in the Shawshank redemption, “hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things.”

    You have beautifully portrayed the importance of traumas in our life and the wisdom we attain while dealing with it.
    However, I feel that if we humans are a little more kind towards people around us, dealing with traumas would be a much easier.
    If we normalise certain things like failures, setbacks, losing a job, getting cheated etc it would be way more easy to cope. I mean traumas are inevitable in life and necessary for growth but it doesn’t have to be dealt hard way only.

    Your post reminded me of Rilke who said,
    Let everything happen to you. Beauty and terror.
    Just keep going, no feeling is final.
    My only input is that while living our life and dealing with our problems if we are a little more sensitive towards our family, friends and people around, there would be less traumas.

    I thank you for writing this. We need more and more of such wisdom.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Atul.
      I’m so glad you understood the niche and the exact emotions.
      Readers and people who understand like you enrich the self belief of a writer.
      I’m so glad it resonated and helped.

      Also, beautiful inputs❤️👏🏻✨they work like cherry on the cake.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s absolutely my pleasure Soumya 🙂
    Honestly I hadn’t read something like this in a long time so it’s you who deserve the compliments 🙂 please keep writing, you are excellent at it…

    Liked by 1 person

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